I really like that we are starting to see more diversity in feminist memoirs. That's not to diminish any of the memoirs written by white or black authors - but even as an American born Chinese, there are a a lot of culturally influenced experiences that I have which aren't necessarily addressed in a mainstream white or black woman's experience, so I'm always excited to see other voices being added to the mix -- this one a biracial woman who is half Puerto Rican and half Irish. ( )

I blew through the chapter on friendships, but read the rest of it because I found it interesting, enlightening, and necessary. So necessary, in fact, that I ordered a copy to have handy for my whole family to read, should they ever want to read it.

I thought the chapter on trying to be one of the "guys" and not like those "other women" was refreshing. I definitely struggled with that and it was great to have that experience be given a voice and be acknowledged. I wish I had this book when I was younger. ( )

From the beginning of the novel, Nugent sets a humorous tone with a serious underlying message in her introduction. She starts off her discussion of feminism by talking about the overview of women in the modern world and why feminism is important in today’s society and what that word really means.

Throughout the novel Nugent mixes her own experiences while discussing women’s issues and topics such as: birth control, periods, being multiracial, beauty, friendships and more. She is witty, real, and talks to her readers in an informal voice. Her jokes definitely kept me laughing out loud while reading the entire book.

She brings up many valid points about issues like how society focuses on gender from birth. For example, how girls are taught to play with dolls and boys to play with trucks. Why should it matter? She also gives positive advice like in her chapter on beauty. Nugent frankly says to just “do you” when it comes to makeup, fashion, etc. and not to get caught up in the trends or what’s currently in style. In other words, be unique and stand out from the crowd.

The whole book comes away with the message that “you” the reader should be proud to be a feminist. She also states how important it is to have feminism and how much the fight for gender equality is needed. Even the world won’t change overnight we can still make a difference by taking things one day at a time. ( )

Alida Nugent's essays cover the topics of feminism, sexuality, ethnicity, beauty/appearance, food/dieting, advice received and given. This collection has similar themes to Roxane Gay's Bad Feminist (which Nugent cites) and Caitlin Moran's How to Be A Woman. The tone is familiar and expressive; it's the book I hope teenagers and college kids find, so they can start thinking about some of these things early in life.

Quotes

Feminism: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes. (xvi)
Feminism is fighting for the choice to make informed decisions about your life and body. (xvii)

The cruelest kind of words cut you for the things you can't change: your race, your ethnicity, your sexuality. People use these words because it makes them feel superior to you, because they were taught that having a different race, a different ethnicity, or a different sexuality is bad. (26)

Looking into a mirror and liking what you see is one of the most important and powerful things you can do for yourself. (55)

Ambitious girls, before they found feminism, used to think they had to act like men to get ahead in the world. (92)

So often I had heard the phrase, "you'll know when you have kids," that oftentimes I worry if I birth a child, I will be flooded with such a sense of knowledge that I will knock myself out. (141)

To be a feminist, it's good to be a champion of women, and generally put one thing above the rest: the idea that women are allowed to make their own rational, well-thought-out decisions about their lives....It's always good to check and make sure that your feminism is inclusive. It's easy to judge the world by your own experiences, but you have to remember that we are all different... (198-199)

Wanting to be anything is the whole point of feminism. Having to be something is what feminists fight against. (209) ( )

I finished reading this and instantly gave it to my friend and told every 20-something female I know to find a copy and read it. Nugent's voice is honest, blunt, refreshing, and makes you feel like you're chatting with her in a coffee shop after a few glasses of wine about your deepest darkest secrets.