“Here’s the worst truth: Dad isn’t the birds. He isn’t the ocean. He isn’t a salt or water. My dad is dead.” I hated reading this book, It kept bringing me back to the past of my life when my dad died and I wouldn’t be able to stop thinking and thinking until I forgot I had the book in my hand.

This book is not what I was expecting. The book was bright with colors looking full of light but inside it was not. The book drifted into a lot of other little stories and lead on making it hard to keep track of what is actually happening in the story. Although some of the characters I love and wanted to know more about, the main character marygold I couldn’t grow to like. The book got into politics with characters that could have been left out, because after that I couldn’t relate to the main character no matter what. It totally wrecked the book me, making it a hard book to keep wanting to read.

The book did bring back a time in my mind of thinking about my dad again. But after being caught in mind the thought it is hard to get back on track in the reading. I could relate to Marygold a lot about her feels are when her dad died but other than that I don't find to be my favorite character more so boring. Overall I do not recommend the novel because it tends to lead on and lead off topics into other stories making it hard to read and understand, although there are some characters that I loved to read about and could have fun reading about them, but Marygold was not one of them. So I would not be picking this book up for a second read.

"There's a strange awareness to having a crush, especially one you know you shouldn't be having. It's the feeling - the hope - that at any moment that person could be watching you . . . And they start to look different too. Soft focus blurs out all the weird and ugly parts. All you see are perfect details, like the freckle on the back of a wrist, a soft earlobe. Sometimes, it almost looks like they're glowing."

Mary, or Marigold, is dealing with an abrupt move to New York from California. Her mom's taken her and her sister, Bea, to live with an aunt after their father's death. Mary feels like she's floating through life, and the only way she can capture moments and make them feel real is through a camera. With college applications looming and a new place to figure out, she's struggling to find her footing. Then she meets Jesse, a cute fellow photographer with a darkroom. The only problem is that Mary can't quite seem to let go of Bennet, the boy she kissed just before she left California.

The author draws an intimate portrait of three different ways of dealing with grief - rebellious Bea, withdrawn Mary and their mother, who builds a new life through work. The supporting characters are great, too. Jesse has a heart of gold and just wants Mary to be okay. Sam's equally lovable as the popular nerd left behind by all her older friends, who are on to bigger and better things.

This is a slow build book, with the beautiful notes starting out soft at first, then building to a crescendo as the romance catches on and Mary's family finds different ways to deal with the unraveling of their world. The author shows you the beauty of the world through Mary's photographer eyes, revealing all the feelings Mary can't quite find her way to put into words. This beauty of a book draws you in and feeds your soul.

I highly recommend this one.

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Teen for the advance review copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. ( )