I listened to the audio, then bought the book. This is a now a requirement for our homeschool graduation. EVERYONE should read this. There is no one who cannot benefit from this research and practical tools and insights to improve communication--ESPECIALLY when your emotions run high! At the end, the authors comment on the few managers they interacted with who actually made changes and improved. Change is hard! They acknowledge how difficult it is. The audio was well done, and the humor of our human gut reactions well-communicated. ( )

A good summary on the proper attitude towards every kind of confrontation, negotiation or debate on topics that matter (especially useful as soft-skills repertoire for managers). ( )

This is the best book I've ever read in communication. It has changed my life! Some if the principles that resonated with me were to "Start with Heart" before ant conversation. In other words examine your own motives. Then, "Make it Safe" for the other person(s). Assure them of what you "don't intend" and then follow up with what you "do intend." Give them a chance to tell their story and ask questions tentatively. There are more! You must read this book! ( )

(11) This is the first self-help/work book that I have truly felt was 100% valuable and a satisfying read. What do you do with you are blindsided by a conversation that you have been avoiding or don't want to have? Or you know something needs to be said; and it probably needs to be said by you -- but you are so dreading it? This happens every week in both our professional and our personal life and we blow it - over and over again. We get emotionally hijacked. We tell ourselves victim or villain stories. We resort to either silence or violence. Oh yeah, this resonated for me.

This book gave practical solutions to these situations in easy to understand language with illustrative examples that felt real. The author did a great job of keeping their own personality out of the writing - so many books in this genre start to become more about how fabulous the author is, rather than the wisdom. (Though there were quite a few shout outs to content on their website that is inaccessible unless you sign up -- minus 1 star...) I found myself taking notes and practicing in my mind... Learn to look - are we actually in dialogue here? What is the right conversation to be having - Is it about content, a pattern, or our relationship? What do I really want and what am I acting like I want? Umm, maybe I need a time-out and have the conversation at a different time after I establish these things...

I also liked the process advice - Whoa, not safe - step out and establish mutual respect and purpose. And the STATE my path pneumonic is kinda life changing. I honestly don't know if I can do it - especially in my personal life. What I have at least been practicing though that has been working is a instituting a delay between observations --> emotion --> action. "What is the story I am telling myself?" has been a life changing internal monologue over the last few weeks. Hey, we all gotta start somewhere.

So as you can tell, I am enthusiastic about the advice in this book. Even though I am intelligent and accomplished and well-read - turns out - no one ever taught me this stuff. I've been telling my friends and colleagues that I've been reading a book about how not to be an arsehole. Ha! ( )

A solid work leadership airport type book. ( )