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Networking for People Who Hate Networking: A Field Guide for Introverts,…

de Devora Zack

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215698,345 (3.5)3
Shows how the networking-averse can succeed by working with the very traits that make them hate traditional networking. Written by a proud introvert: who is also an enthusiastic networker. Includes; field-tested tips and techniques for virtually any situation. Are you the kind of person who would rather get a root canal than face a group of strangers? Does the phrase "working a room" make you want to retreat to yours? Does traditional networking advice seem like it's in a foreign language? Devora Zack, an avowed introvert and a successful consultant who speaks to thousands of people every year, feels your pain. She found that most networking advice books assume that to succeed you have to become an outgoing, extraverted person. Or at least learn how to fake it. Not at all. There is another way. This book shatters stereotypes about people who dislike networking. They're not shy or misanthropic. Rather, they tend to be reflective-they think before they talk. They focus intensely on a few things rather than broadly on a lot of things. And they need time alone to recharge. Because they've been told networking is all about small talk, big numbers and constant contact, they assume it's not for them. But it is! Zack politely examines and then smashes to tiny fragments the "dusty old rules" of standard networking advice. She shows how the very traits that ordinarily make people networking-averse can be harnessed to forge an approach that is just as effective as more traditional approaches, if not better. And she applies it to all kinds of situations, not just formal networking events. After all, as she says, life is just one big networking opportunity-notion readers can now embrace. Networking enables you to accomplish the things that are important to you. But you can't adopt a style that goes against who you are-and you don't have to. "I have never met a person who did not benefit tremendously from learning how to network-on his or her own terms", Zack writes. "You do not succeed by denying your natural temperament; you succeed by working with your strengths."… (mais)
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Worth reading if you're an introvert who has truly hated or not seen the benefit of networking. If you have some grasp of its benefits, then this book offers tips for how to do networking "the introvert way," without draining your resources or trying to make you something you're not. But like I said: networking has its benefits, and yes, you need to do it. ( )
  Bart_Leahy | May 27, 2019 |
‘There is no such thing as failure, only feedback.’

Okay, so here’s my feedback.

The tips are useful, I can't deny that. Prepare beforehand, focus on a small number of people, ask open-ended questions, leave when you become tired, treat people the way they want to treated, tip staff, remember names, take notes on all interactions afterwards, and follow-up within a couple of days with a thoughtful email. That’s the basics.

The title doesn’t reflect the entire book. A more accurate title would be ‘Introverts vs. Extroverts: How to deal with all types of people’. The author is a ‘confident introvert’ and so the focus is on identifying and understanding introverts. The book starts off by drawing up the pros and cons of being in either camp and those that fall in the middle of the scale, centroverts. A self-assessment is included to identify which camp the reader is in however, I don’t believe it’s a very accurate. It seems to be skewed towards identifying introverts as centroverts.

If you're an introvert but haven't really thought about it much before, then you'll probably be really happy when your introverted attributes have been validated here, and might find yourself saying, "That's me!" The author really tries to wipe away the negativity associated with being an introvert and I have to applaud her for her efforts. Zack argues introverts are often misunderstood and should be valued for their positive characteristics because we as society wouldn't be able to function without them, especially as it's supposedly split 50/50 extroverts and introverts.

Much later we finally get to the tips on business networking functions (with a small section on job searching), which in itself is a very narrow subject area considering the author states ‘Life is one giant networking opportunity’ although you can extrapolate some of the tips for other social situations.

‘The case of the rambling introvert’ –that’s the entire book, most notably the second half. Lots of rambling. This could be condensed into either a shorter book (by a third, at least) or a long but concise article/essay. All of the real-world examples given weren’t necessary. Some I skipped completely because I all ready had the gist of what was being said. On the other hand, sometimes it was unclear and I wished the author was more direct and forthcoming.

I'm glad I got this at a substantially reduced price at £1.39. I wouldn't be happy if I'd bought it at today's price of over £7. I'm hoping [b:Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking|8520610|Quiet The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking|Susan Cain|http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1328562861s/8520610.jpg|13387396] will be, overall, a more rewarding read.


*Bought in the 12 Days of Kindle sale of Xmas 2011. ( )
  Cynical_Ames | Sep 23, 2014 |
Devora Zacks engagiertes Buch richtet sich an einen introvertierten Personenkreis, zu dem sich die Autorin selbst zählt. Der introvertierten Leserschaft soll vermittelt werden, dass sie genauso gut dafür begabt ist, zwischenmenschliche Beziehungen zu pflegen wie extrovertierte Menschen. Sie hat nur eine andere Herangehensweise. Die Introvertierten werden ausdrücklich dazu ermutigt, ihren eigenen Stil beizubehalten und sich selbst treu zu bleiben, unabhängig davon, was andere Menschen ihnen einreden wollen. Weit verbreitet ist ja die Ansicht, dass nur die Verhaltensweise extrovertierter Menschen, die keinerlei Mühe haben, auf andere zuzugehen, die richtige sei. Devora Zack betont nun aber, dass die Bevölkerung zu einem großen Prozentsatz aus introvertierten Personen besteht und dass dies seine Richtigkeit hat. Introvertierte sollen sich nun auf keinen Fall Verhaltensweisen überstülpen lassen oder zwanghaft sich anzueignen versuchen, die ihnen einfach nicht liegen. Devora Zack zeigt, dass Introvertierte auf ihre Weise genauso gut ihre zwischenmenschlichen Beziehungen aufbauen und pflegen können, wenn sie sich immer wieder genug Freiräume schaffen, um allein zu sein, da Alleinsein für sie eine Energiequelle ist. Für Introvertierte hat es – im Gegensatz zu Extrovertierten – einfach keinen Sinn, sich wild in Geselligkeiten zu stürzen. Sie würden sich damit überfordern. Die Autorin erklärt zugleich, dass die Herangehensweise extrovertierter Menschen ebenso ihre Berechtigung hat. Sie betont, dass ihr Buch sich auch an diesen Personenkreis wendet. Außerdem gibt es nach ihrer Ansicht noch eine weitere Gruppe, die sich in etwa zwischen den beiden Polen von Intro- und Extrovertiertheit bewegt. Diese bezeichnet sie als „zentrovertiert“. Von Devora Zacks Buch kann also grundsätzlich jeder profitieren. Es zielt außerdem nicht explizit auf Situationen im beruflichen Umfeld ab, mit welchen man Networking gemeinhin in Zusammenhang bringt. Die Autorin erklärt vielmehr, dass Networking immer und überall stattfindet. Ihre Ratschläge können auf alle Lebenslagen übertragen werden.

Als eine ihrer zentralen Lebensregeln stellt Devora Zack den Grundsatz auf, man solle andere Menschen nicht so behandeln, wie man selbst behandelt werden will, sondern so, wie sie, die anderen, behandelt werden wollen. Introvertierte Personen sieht sie für diese Aufgabe geradezu prädestiniert an, da sie gemeinhin viel Einfühlungsvermögen besitzen. Sie gesteht selbst ein, dass dies eine schwierige, allerdings lohnende Aufgabe sei. Den Leser beschleichen leise Zweifel, ob die Umsetzung dieses Ratschlags denn möglich sei; die Tauglichkeit des Ratschlags muss sich im wirklichen Leben erweisen. Gegen Ende des Buches gibt die Autorin einen weiteren, wichtigen Tipp: Veränderungen im Leben seien nur möglich, wenn man klare – und auch erreichbare – Ziele formuliere. Nur eine Antwort bleibt sie dem Leser schuldig: Warum es denn überhaupt so unterschiedliche Typen wie Introvertierte, Zentrovertierte und Extrovertierte gibt. Die zwischenmenschlichen Beziehungen wären um vieles einfacher, wenn alle Menschen nur einem Typus angehören würden – vermutlich aber auch viel langweiliger. Devora Zacks Buch ist humorvoll geschrieben, anregend und sehr ermutigend - eines der besten Ratgeber-Bücher, die ich seit langem gelesen habe. ( )
  buchstabendompteurin | Aug 3, 2012 |
This book provides some very solid advice for those of us on the more introverted side of the scale when it comes to the dreaded "networking". As an introvert herself, the author is well equipped to provide personal examples of the techniques she espouses. What I particularly liked was her emphasis on making sure you have enough time to process your encounters, to step back and gather your energy instead of being go-go-go all the time and burning yourself out. Another good coping strategy is to become involved in the event setup or teardown -- having a clearly defined role is often very good for introverts (I would tend to agree), as it provides a focus instead of dissipating your energy worrying about what to do at an more unstructured event.

I also liked the examples taken from her seminars, including one workshop she ran for engineers, which as you can imagine is a very introverted group -- the workshop worked best when the engineers had heard the topics of discussion beforehand and were given a minute or two to prepare individual answers before sharing with the group. I wanted to copy this example out and send it to the higher-ups in our office for future meetings.

The main issue I had with the book was that I felt like it was trying too hard to be funny, at least in comparison with The Introvert Advantage. And it did get kind of repetitive in the shattering-stereotypes department, although that could just be my perspective from having read the other book first. Still, I would recommend this for people who find themselves described in the title. There's something to take away for most readers. ( )
  rabbitprincess | Jan 19, 2012 |
Readable, full of practical advice for people who "never know what to say." Zack begins by discussing the introvert, how to recognize an introvert, and let's the introvert know he's not wierd - and that it's all right to need "me-time" to recharge. She follows that with a discussion of comping strategies for different situations. Zack's book isn't just encouragement on how to mingle and get to know people - although there is a lot of that - it's also full of tips on what to say and do to break the ice without feeling like a complete social misfit. Short, enjoyable, and the kind of book where everyone will find a take-away. Highly recommended. ( )
  OliviainNJ | May 27, 2011 |
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Shows how the networking-averse can succeed by working with the very traits that make them hate traditional networking. Written by a proud introvert: who is also an enthusiastic networker. Includes; field-tested tips and techniques for virtually any situation. Are you the kind of person who would rather get a root canal than face a group of strangers? Does the phrase "working a room" make you want to retreat to yours? Does traditional networking advice seem like it's in a foreign language? Devora Zack, an avowed introvert and a successful consultant who speaks to thousands of people every year, feels your pain. She found that most networking advice books assume that to succeed you have to become an outgoing, extraverted person. Or at least learn how to fake it. Not at all. There is another way. This book shatters stereotypes about people who dislike networking. They're not shy or misanthropic. Rather, they tend to be reflective-they think before they talk. They focus intensely on a few things rather than broadly on a lot of things. And they need time alone to recharge. Because they've been told networking is all about small talk, big numbers and constant contact, they assume it's not for them. But it is! Zack politely examines and then smashes to tiny fragments the "dusty old rules" of standard networking advice. She shows how the very traits that ordinarily make people networking-averse can be harnessed to forge an approach that is just as effective as more traditional approaches, if not better. And she applies it to all kinds of situations, not just formal networking events. After all, as she says, life is just one big networking opportunity-notion readers can now embrace. Networking enables you to accomplish the things that are important to you. But you can't adopt a style that goes against who you are-and you don't have to. "I have never met a person who did not benefit tremendously from learning how to network-on his or her own terms", Zack writes. "You do not succeed by denying your natural temperament; you succeed by working with your strengths."

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