Gershen Kaufman

Summary: This book explains what self-esteem is and why kids need it. It also provides real-life examples, along with tips and tools, to help children learn positive ways to deal with their feelings and be confident inside.

Reflection: This book is a excellent resource for children on building self-esteem and learning how to be more assertive. It isn't geared towards just bullying--it also talks about getting teased and put-down by peers, siblings, and even parents. Additionally, this would be a great book to read with students and talk together about the examples, concepts, and activities.… (mais)

Stick Up for Yourself: Every Kid’s Guide to Personal Power and Positive Self-Esteem by Gershen Kaufman, Ph.D., et al. Epiphany library section 9 A: Juvenile (gr. K-5), Values. This book for ages 8-12 focuses on sticking up for yourself. To stick up for yourself, you need personal power and positive self-esteem.
To get these things, first you need to be able to recognize your feelings, like anger, frustration or fear. When you know what you are feeling, you can explain your feelings to others so they can see things from your point of view. It makes your feelings less scary too, and easier to control. This book even discusses degrees of the same feeling. For example, surprise or anger are low intensity feelings. What do they feel like at higher intensity? Surprise becomes being startled and anger becomes rage. It helps to know how strong your feelings are. With practice you will also be able to tell if someone else is just a little bit angry, or ready to pop their cork!
We all need to feel worthwhile, to feel like we belong, to care for others. When you understand what your needs are, you can check your feelings to see if those needs are being met or not. For example, if your need to feel like you belong is not being met, you might feel lonely. You could ask a friend over, or join a club to feel like you belong. This book also tells you ways to take a “feelings break,” such as riding your bike or reading a joke book.
You know how some kids try to lord it over others? They try to take away your power by bullying you, or by being unkind. This book tells you how and why kids do this, and how to keep your own personal power. If you are bullied or you are shy, there is lots of help for you here.
The last chapter is about self-esteem, not to be confused with conceit, arrogance or superiority. Self-esteem means being proud of yourself because you’ve done things you are proud of. When you join personal power with self-esteem you will be able to stick up for yourself. You will respect yourself enough to not let others take away your power. You will not follow others into mischief so easily either. You will be a more powerful, confident YOU!
This book has cartoon illustrations and is especially for kids (although your parents and teachers can learn a lot from it too). If you are 8-12 and have been picked on at school, been blamed for things you didn’t do, and wish you could stick up for yourself, this book can help!… (mais)

The dramatic acceleration in recent years of borderline, addictive, abusing and eating disorders has moved shame into the spotlight. No other affect is more central to identity formation and hence to mental health. In "The Psychology of Shame", Gershen Kaufman synthesizes object-relations, interpersonal and affect theories, to provide a powerful and multidimensional view of this pivotal emotion. Making liberal use of clinical case material throughout the book, Dr Kaufman illustrates the application of affect theory to six general classes of shame-based syndromes: compulsive; schizoid; depressive and paranoid; phobic; sexual dysfunction; splitting; and sociopathic and psychopathic. In addition, he focuses on many specific syndromes that are facing practitioners today - from bulimia to borderline personality disorders. "The Psychology of Shame" presents a new and comprehensive developmental theory of shame, identity and the self. Key chapters on specific treatment strategies and interventions should make it particularly useful in clinical practice.… (mais)